I often complain at the end of the day that I have absolutely no more energy. So when someone calls out, "Hey Seal! Could you set the table?" I will typically groan like I just ran a marathon and pulled six or seven muscles in ONE LEG ALONE, shuffle over, blindly pull out some forks and knives, dump them on the table in a pattern somewhat reminiscent of the rib cage of a stegosaurus, and then stagger back to the couch.
Hey, forget end of the day. I usually groan more in the mornings. Sleep is supposed to replenish your energy supply, right? It doesn't. From a study I have conducted (which consisted of me asking people politely over the years how they felt and was complained to) most people agree. Mornings are not a time of energy.
So when does one get their energy back? Right when you don't want it. Late at night. About two hours before you're supposed to go to bed. Suddenly you start making all kinds of jokes, bouncing around the house, playing pranks on your siblings, and you're making up for that dinner you were "toooo...tiiiireedddd...." to eat by grabbing any sweet you can find and stuffing yourself. Very healthy mix. And...well...you've got no desire to go. "Bedtime is11? We'll just turn the lights out at 12:30."
So, after arguing with your parents or your sense of healthy living, you finally convince yourself that you've had more than enough brownies, to stop bouncing up and down on the stairs, and get into bed. And...wonder of wonders, you are farrrrr too hyped up to sleep. When you finally do fall asleep (around 2 AM), you have high powered energy dreams, where you're riding across the ocean in a boat and suddenly the engine goes out and you're in shark infested waters with six other useless and screaming passengers and the sharks are all coming after you so you use your Chuck Norris super powers to smack all the sharks in the face and save all the other passengers and the pretty girl (or...handsome guy) comes up ready to kiss you and says in a deep, beautiful voice..."Lampshade."
Well, of course, that's your brain's interpretation of your alarm clock, which has been blaring at you for the past 15 minutes. You were so exhausted and energy depleted from all your shark kicking that you didn't hear it, so now you're late for class. You groggily get out of bed and start the whole cycle all over again.
In other words, I was exhausted and tired, and trying to wake up, so I wrote a blog post.